Biden: “Trump Will Have to Clean Prison Toilets”
WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - Donald Trump will have to clean prison toilets amongst other tasks in prison, Joe Biden has revealed.
Hacker Releases Jailbroken ChatGPT Called “GODMODE GPT”
SILICON VALLEY - USA - A hacker has found a way to bypass the guardrail shackles of ChatGPT, calling it "GODMODE GPT".
Google AI Said It’s Okay to Wear a Rucksack Full of Large Rocks and Jump Off a 10-Storey Building
MOUNTAIN VIEW - USA - Apparently the bonkers overtly woke Google AI is giving out some rather interesting answers to users questions.
Comrade Starmer: “Your State Pension Will Be My Personal Socialist Spending Spree”
MANCHESTER - England - Labour leader Comrade Starmer plans on taxing your state pension to use as his personal spending piggy bank.
MORE NEWS HEADLINES
Insincere Electioneering: Sunak Proposes National Service For 18-Year-Olds
LONDON - England - A little too late for the insincere electioneering of Sunak, proposing National Service for 18-year-olds.
Inheritance Tax: Why You Should Do an Anne Robinson
LONDON - England - Anne Robinson is gifting her children a large portion of her wealth to avoid inheritance tax. More should follow her lead.
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POLITICAL SATIRE NEWS
Unelected Technocrat Seeks Election For First Time
LONDON - England - An unelected technocrat who seeks election for the first time has called a General Election on July 4th.
Brainbridge – “Anyone for a head transplant?” WATCH VIDEO
SILICON VALLEY - USA - The head transplant company Brainbridge has unveiled an ambitious plan to extend human life by hundreds of years. Watch the video here.
Globe Being Setup For Next Pandemic – Disease X
BEIJING - China - The globe may be being setup for the next pandemic involving Disease X.
Inflation Supposedly Drops – Prices Still Rising
LONDON - England - An announcement that inflation has supposedly dropped is a load of codswallop. Prices are still rising in the UK.
SCI/TECH
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RANDOM SQUIBS Last 7 days
US Navy Dunces Sail the High Seas
HICKAM - Hawaii - US Navy dunces are now sailing the high seas in state-of-the-art ships they can't control.
Uh Oh! Iranian President Mysteriously Killed in Helicopter Crash
AZERBAIJAN - No one knows yet how the Iranian president perished in a helicopter crash over mountainous terrain.
Transgender People Label Country of Peru as “Mentally Ill”
LIMA - Peru - Transgender people are outraged at being labelled as "mentally ill" and are now saying that the entire country is "mentally ill" instead of them.
SATIRE NEWS
LONDON - England - The Vehicle Identification Number (VIN) is a crucial part of a car's history and fingerprint. That's why you need a reliable VIN decoder to find out info about any vehicle.
ANOTHER NEWS HEADLINE
How Parents Can Manage the Stress of Bringing Up Mentally Challenged Children
LOS ANGELES - USA - For parents, raising mentally challenged children can be a challenging task filled with stress. Here are some tips on coping.
Eurovision Gay Olympics Contest Spectacle Finale
MALMO - Sweden - This year's Eurovision Gay Olympics Contest was proudly the gayest ever event witnessed on live European TV.
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NEWS ON THE HOUR
Alien From Outer Space Starts New UK Political Party to Replace Tories
BARNARD CASTLE - England - An alien from outer space says his ‘Start-Up Party’ could capitalise on the collapse of the Conservative vote at the general election.
Oh Dear! 5 Reasons Why British Women Are Miserable
LONDON - England - New research reveals that many British women are miserable. Here are 5 reasons why women in the UK are so sad.
Is Russell Brand Trying to Dodge His Karma by Converting to Christianity?
UJJAIN - India - A highly ranked Hindu guru has postulated that celebrity Russell Brand converting to Christianity means he is trying to dodge his karma.
Welcome to Sunak’s Crime Wave Britain
GRIMELY - England - The UK is now a neglected crime-ridden sewer. Welcome to Sunak's crime wave Britain.
Stormy Daniels Trump Hump Dump in Court Extravaganza
NEW YORK - USA - Adult film star Stormy Daniels went into intricate detail about her encounter with Donald Trump, even receiving a standing ovation from the court's jury and judge.
THE DAILY SQUIB - BRITISH NEWS SATIRE
Gen Z Woman Demands Millennials Stop Saying These ‘Out of Date’ Slang Words
PHILADELPHIA - USA - Gen Z woman demands millennials stop saying these 'out of date 'slang words: 'If you use these, you're officially old'.
DIY Fashion Hacks: Transforming Old Clothes into New Statements
LONDON - England - Here are some great DIY fashion hacks for transforming old clothes into new creations.
Fans Wonder Why Kim Kardashian Only Travels in a Stretch Limousine?
LOS ANGELES - USA - Fans of porn celebrity Kim Kardashian have been wondering why she always travels in a stretch limousine?